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Surreal  (6.01.15)

It is surreal to know I’ll be waking up from surgery in less than 48 hours without one of my feet.  A foot and leg I’ve fought for almost 34 years to keep. I’ve had over 40 surgeries in my life (over 30 have been on my leg), but this week’s will certainly be unlike the others.  This is letting go of something I thought I needed to be whole, but realized is an obstacle to who I can be.  I’m trying to stay curious about it, but it is overwhelming.  I’m reminding myself I am taking a big step towards a new life, though I’m having moments I feel I may dissolve into a puddle.  

Tomorrow I’ll be heading to Indianapolis, in preparation for surgery Wednesday with Dr. Jan Ertl at Indiana University North Hospital.  My parents will be with me, as they were after my accident in 1981.  I’m blessed with supportive family and friends.  I’m grateful for the many great people in my life, which now includes new friends I've met on my quest to learn about what my new life will be like as an amputee.